Just today

Who knows what mysteries lurk deep in the heart of a writer, therapist, paramedic, accountant nerd. I sure don't. The more I dive into the mysteries of my clients, the more I realize what little I know about myself.

I've been busily studying Imago Relationship Therapy with it's theory of unconscious desires and expectations people have of each other. Sometimes I think it's a miracle that anyone stays together ever!

So what's going on in the inaccessible portion of MY brain?

Don't know so I guess I'll focus on the fact that spring is actually here with summer not far behind.  This place (North Idaho) dramatically transforms in the summer to a kind of paradise. I takes an annual long hard winter once a year to see and appreciate that.

This last winter was one of the toughest I'v ever waded through so I'm really looking forward to the changes warm weather may bring.

The Room With Many Windows

It was our TV room.  The focal point was a 1959 Zenith portable black and white TV that had the annoying habit of losing its vertical hold thus making the picture flip over and over, making it un-watchable until someone got up to play with the “vertical hold dial” until it became stable.  The TV sat on a low table and was next to the door that led out into the back yard that was filled with the promise of adventure in the woods and undiscovered neighborhoods. A giant maroon couch sat opposite; somehow garnered from my grandparents.  I remember it being big enough to hold myself along with two brothers and two sisters.

One wall was filled with double-pane windows, each of which opened with a crank.  I once broke one of those expensive windows with a championship-like 3 wood from the far reaches of the back yard.  It seemed impossible that the house was at risk at that distance, but my 7 year old brain was wrong.

Along the opposite wall were light colored wood bookshelves with cabinets beneath which contained my entire collection of toys including beloved GI Joes and a matchbox car collection.  One shelf contained a dark red and blue World Book Encyclopedia circa 1950 or so.  Many a school assignment was completed using that particular resource.  An encyclopedia scent would emanate from pages that had maybe never been opened before. The more often visited pages smelled of peanut butter and jelly.

Next to those book shelves was the best part of the room.  It was a traditional single hung sash pane window that opened to…not the great outdoors…but the living room.  Yes, an outside window stood inexplicably between our TV room and the living room. I used to open it every once in a while just because I could and I thought it was really cool.

I was probably 30 before it occurred to me to ask my father about the window.  He told me when the house was being built the TV room was meant to be a screened porch and he changed his mind and asked for a regular room.  The contractor told him the window was already framed and my dad said “What the hell, leave it in.” That made it even more cool.

I met a real Freedom Rider today: Max Pavesic

He was a Freedom Rider in 1961 and he "and 14 others, black and white, held their ground in a “whites only” waiting room in a train station until they were charged with a breach of peace.

Nonviolent but defiant, the Freedom Riders were hauled off to a maximum security prison and held there near death-row cells for the misdemeanor crime." (Source Bonner County Daily Bee)

I admire Harville Hendrix.  he is founder of Imago therapy which is a widely accepted modality for couples therapy.  I am a believer in his theory, but that's not the sole reason for my admiration.

Harville Hendrix was a professor teaching couples therapy to psychology students when he was divorced.  In fact, her went from the courthouse to teach a class. Here he was, an expert in the field of partner counseling, in a failed marriage.  As it turns out his students knew where he was and greeted him with compassion.  A discussion about relationships ensued where each student shared personal details about past and present relationships.

At the end of class a student asked him what keeps couples together.  He answered: I have absolutely no idea.

That is why I hold him in such high esteem.  When a person regarded as an expert can say those words in the context of their expertise great powers are unleashed.  Having the humility to question ones self and to say so out loud is a great strength. Removing ego and opening the door to new ideas is where true innovation is born.

Over the next year he developed Imago Therapy and subsequently changed the lives of thousands of people.

So sometimes I'm an idiot.  Not a lot, but I'm entirely capable. This weekend I whipped up a major IRS/ Tax issue for myself.  I had nightmares about it - I was actually eaten by a whale.

Only a day or so after I blog about being annoyed with people that use the internet to support their crazy views...I do EXACTLY that!

I calmed down, checked my sources - found better ones and it turns out it was a false alarm.

Not only an idiot but hypocrite as well.

Cheers!

I love Facebook but I just despise people that post garbage from the internet.  Fake news. Fake science. Fake theories.  When are people going to wake up and figure out that just because something is posted on the internet DOES NOT MEAN IT'S TRUE!!!

Almost every claim can be checked out by Googling the subject and looking for legitimate sources.  For example the mayo clinic or NIH are pretty good sources.  For science issues scientificamerican.com or smithsomianmag.com.  For politics I like Politifact - I don't always agree with their conclusions but they show their sources of information.

It's a pretty good idea to check things out with sources that have widely acclaimed reliability.

In the past couple of days I've come face-to-face with a couple of conspiracy theories.

First: 911 Truth

What they claim: That the towers came down because of planted bombs and not the planes.  There was a massive cover-up.

When you present contrary data they: Claim the sources can't be trusted because they are either stupid or part of the conspiracy.

Protandim

What they claim: This pill you can buy for $45 a month can cure a variety of things the least of which is aging. They say the pills will reduce "oxidative stress" by 40% within 30 days." This is measured by a blood test that looks at a thing called TBARS (thiobarbituric acid-reactive substances). It does apprently work to lower this marker. But is questionable how much lowering this value effects your health. There are studies - but I can't find one that links health benefits to protandim in human beings.  There is one for mice though...

When you present contrary data they: Any criticism is arranged by the big pharmaceutical companies because they are terrified Protandim is going to cut into their business.  Also, I took protandim for a year and it did nothing for me but relieve me of about $500.  Both the company (when I called to cancel) and local protandim converts say the same thing:  "You won't know what the benefits are until you stop taking it and bad things happen."

Really??? So if I take it and good things happen, then protandim is great.  If I stop taking it and bad things happen protandim is great.  Oh and if I hear anything negative it's the drug company conspiracy.

This is the problem with conspiracy theories:  By their nature they reject any evidence contrary to what the theory holds.  If you find contrary evidence, then you have simply uncovered more evidence of the conspiracy.

I find it incredibly disturbing that intelligent people fall for this crap.  Don’t get me started on Obama birthers and climate change and evolution deniers!